Black outs

[ranman]

My first black out was in 1979 at my desk at work and I just got off the highway. All I remember was waking up in the ER at the Hosp.

I haven't had a seizure since, but my EEG's keep showing epileptic activities in the left temporal lobe, as a result, I have to stay on the meds as an insurance policy and have my blood levels monitored on a regular basis in order to keep my drivers licence.

Although I havn't had any more grande-mal seizures, During the past 3 or 4 yrs I get frequent petit-mals (partials).
They are increasing as I'm getting older. I had a petit-mal in Dec./2002 while driving in the Wal-Mart parking lot and as a result, my drivers licence was suspended.

I've been driving since 1970 with no problems and now my "freedom" has been stripped away.

I have lots more to talk about but I'll save it for another day.

Randy

[Mandi]

I remember my first black out as well. I was playing basketball with my Daddy and brother at our house. I slipped and bumped my knee, stood up, and instantly fell face first into the rocks. I blacked out, stook, and lost control of my bladder. I remember coming to and seeing my Daddy's face so scared. Waking up crying and not knowing what happened the last few moments is just terrifying.

[andrew]

The bewilderment and disorientation after a grande mal has to be the worst part. It used to be a long time before I could figure out what had happened, where I was, even who I was. Once I woke up in an ambulance, got asked my name by a medic and realised I didn't know the answer. I also lost all track of time. One evening I came to at home, phoned my office and apologised for having been unconscious all day. The slightly bewildered person who answered the phone told me he'd seen me in the office that day. The seizure, of course, had only struck about a quarter of an hour earlier.

I've never known anything worst than a grande mal. My condition's not exactly wonderful now but I thank God, and whichever genius invented Tegretol, that I haven't had one for years.

Andrew

[fourstar]

My first grand mal was in 7th grade after lunch. I went to jewish school, the english part was getting ready to start and I was talking to my girlfreind, it was a jewish hoiliday we had bags of food given special for that holiday and I was trading something with my girlfriend and I had my frirst sz. What I remember is waking up in the rabbis office and he asked me to stick my tongue out. I was happy to apligize. I think I puked next. I remember him giving me the garbage to vomit in.
My parents came and got me and helped me walk home which was just a across the street . It seemed so long that day. I got home and I went to bed. I woke up to hear my wonderful sister saying she wasn't going to get stuck taking care of me and than evening I went to the gp who gave me dilantin. Within a week I had a rash and I was sent to a nuero who I didn't like and my mom found me a new Dr. Who was strict,tough and demanding. Who's motto was Epilepsy is no excuse .
I lost my best friend ,cause she was freaked out by my seizure,but I went on to make new best friends . But the hurt that girl caused me ,has never been forgotten or forgiven.
After that I had to adjust to medication, when I never took a pill before in my life. And the high that I felt and had no one to talk too about it. I still love the song white rabbit, one pill makes you larger. Thats exactly how I felt on mesantion and zarontion the first 6 months.
Riva

[heidihope]

My first black out was in my apartment bathroom, by myself. I had a bloody nose, and went in there, and ended up waking up with blood all through my hair, and all over the bathroom. I called one of my best friends, who lived in the apartment complex, and she and her boyfriend came over just in time for me to go into another tonic-clonic. I remember telling the paramedics that it was just back spasms, that I had them all the time, b/c I didn't know that those weird jerks I'd been having since Jr. High were actually seizures. Jenny, my friend, was the one who kept saying it was a seizure, b/c her brother had a grand mal with a brain aneurism when he was nine, and she knew what they looked like and what to do. I worked with her, and had one at work three months later, and again, she was the one to explain it to the paramedics. I am so incredibly grateful for her. I, too, have lost friends and boyfriends from having seizures, but my biggest thing is that it is never an excuse. Fortunately my boyfriend, Josh, pretty much makes me talk about it, and constantly tells me that I don't have to be ultra-strong and cheerful all the time; it's okay to get irritable and cry, to vent and want to scream about it. I'm glad for that, b/c I've never really been able to talk to anyone about it. It's not the focus of my life, and I hate having it as the topic of conversation. Now that I can talk about it, and write on forums like this, the world is so much better. You can love me through it or leave me, but I'll still be me.

[fourstar]

Josh sounds like a gem Heidi. You know the only person to dump me because of the epilepsy was that first best friend. Who I dislike to this day.lol

Riva

[andrew]

And so you should, Riva. In fact, you should probably write down the reason you still dislike them just in case you ever forget it. If somebody ditches us because of our condition, it's a good indicator of their all-round worthlessness. Either they're too self-involved to make the effort or too prejudiced to want to. Whichever, good riddance. If someone doesn't quite know what to do when you're having a seizure, that's understandable. If they run away from you permanently, that isn't. This is probably preaching to the converted here but I'll still say it: it's their problem, not yours.

[fourstar]

I was in 7th grade, I never got over that hurt,that my best girlfriend dumped me. Thankfully it never happened again.

Riva

[rainzy]

I was in the 6th grade & lost my best friend too. My first sz. was in class so everyone knew. I was never again invited to a slumber party & though I was one of the best volley ball players, people stopped asking me to be on their team. That hurt.

[fourstar]

Sorry Rainzy,hopefully life got better for you as you got older.

((((hugs))))))
Riva